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USA AND CANADA by redhotshot


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Submitted on
March 15, 2009
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Author's note: So this is a fill I did for someone at the hetalia kink meme ^^ It was such a cute request X3

Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING.


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Matthew had no idea why his brother enjoyed watching movies that made him shit his pants. Honestly, the smart thing would be to NOT watch the movies. And to also tell his Hollywood directors to ease up on the horror. But NO, Matt had to remember that Alfred was a self-proclaimed hero. He thrived on scary and dangerous stuff because, in his mind, it made him stronger.

As Matt inserted the DVD into the player on the wide screen television, he rolled his eyes as he saw his brother trembling on the couch, holding a blanket up to his eyes. “We don’t have to watch this, Al,” he grumbled.

The other shook his head. “No way, I have to watch this! I’m the hero!”

“Sure, sure. Now move over, Mr. Hero, and stop hogging the blanket, eh?”

Alfred pouted, but continued shaking. Matthew sighed heavily and waited for the movie to start. It wasn’t a minute through before he felt his brother’s shaking hand reach around to encircle his arm. Alfred’s eyes were wide with fear behind his glasses as he stared at the screen. The light from the TV illuminated off their faces (because Alfred had said heroes need to watch scary movies in complete darkness).

The Canadian was beginning to doubt his brother’s sanity, if he had ever had any to begin with. The title to the movie flashed on the screen and Matthew had to purse his lips. The Exorcist? Why, oh why, did his brother have to choose something like this for them to watch? Why not a nice comedy?

Al’s breathing was speeding up and nothing had even happened yet. He poked his brother. “Hey, Al.”

Alfred nearly jumped out of his skin. “W-What?! Oh…um…what?”

“You’re squeezing my arm so tight that the circulation’s gone.”

“O-Oh…sorry.” He released his brother then and went back to watching the film. Matthew didn’t like scary films anymore than his brother did. Yet for some reason, he had let Alfred coerce him into watching this one with him. He was sure the American didn’t realize he was acting like a human rattle. He shook his head and turned his attention back to the TV.

Twenty minutes went by and Alfred was pretty much terrified out of his mind and clinging to Matthew with a death grip. The other blonde wasn’t doing any better. Even after telling himself repeatedly that it was just a movie, that nothing was real, he was becoming scared. At one particular scene, America screamed and stood up holding his head. “OH GOD!! OHGODOHOGODOHGOD!!!” Matt took that opportunity to grab his abandoned blanket and wrap it around himself. “Did you SEE that? OH MY GOD!” He continued ranting for a little while longer, blue eyes wide. He eventually sat back down and cuddled right up to his sibling.

“A-Al, you’re heavy,” Matthew hissed.

“S-Sorry…” The American moved away. “It’s just this movie’s kinda…scarier than I thought and—OHSHITHERHEADJUSTTURNEDALLTHEWAYAROUND!!!” he shrieked.

Matthew screamed with him, because the close-up of a rotating demonic head was enough to make him wet himself (not that he did, mind you). The brothers hugged each other before clumsily falling onto the floor. Matthew crawled to turn the movie off, but Alfred stopped him, manly tears coming from his eyes.

“No! You can’t stop it, Matt! We need to finish watching it!”

“But look at us, Al!” he snapped. “We’ve been reduced to tears!”

“Manly tears! And don’t worry, I’ll protect you!”

Matthew wanted to smack him. “Protect me? You can’t even protect yourself!”

Alfred laughed nervously. “I’ll be fine, really. C’mon, let’s finish this.”

“You’re an idiot.” They sat back down on the couch and resumed watching.

Alfred was holding him again and as the Canadian opened his mouth to lecture him, the other blonde mumbled into his chest, “I’ll protect you, Matt. I’m the hero, I have to. No matter how scary this movie is, I’ll withstand it with you until the bitter end.”

Oddly romantic, given who it was coming from. Matthew sighed and held his shaking brother back. “I stand corrected. You’re a sappy heroic idiot.” Alfred smiled before glancing at the TV again and whimpering. Just then a familiar gray alien walked into the room and gave the two brothers a strange look (but then when did Tony ever give them normal looks anyway?). “Don’t even ask,” Matthew deadpanned, fearing for his blood circulation as his brother squeezed him.
:iconimhappyplz:
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:iconkspowell2002:
Kspowell2002 Featured By Owner Sep 20, 2014  New member Student Filmographer
Hehe
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:iconkotetsufan:
Kotetsufan Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2014
I watched exorcist it was ridiculously scary, but I'm curious about what Americas reaction would be for Mirrors
Reply
:iconnekonekogirl04:
NekoNekoGirl04 Featured By Owner Feb 27, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
This is cute and funny! Awesome work~ ^^ :thumbsup:
Reply
:iconkandyrain:
KandyRain Featured By Owner Sep 8, 2012   Artist
Tony: DA FUQ? AINT YOU BROS?
XD
Reply
:iconspottedcloud123:
spottedcloud123 Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2012
ADORABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply
:iconthestrangerinthefog:
TheStrangerInTheFog Featured By Owner Dec 7, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
LMAO :heart:
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:icondaughterofgrimreaper:
DaughterOfGrimReaper Featured By Owner Aug 16, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I love this, made me laugh.
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:iconlight-kunismygod:
light-kunismygod Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2011  Student Traditional Artist
I have to ask was America on crack?
Reply
:iconblackkatjing:
BlackKatJing Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2010
OHSHITHERHEADJUSTTURNEDALLTHEWAYAROUND
i cant stop laughfing :iconimhappierplz:
Reply
:iconmariebd1:
Mariebd1 Featured By Owner Aug 15, 2010
...You'd think Tony would be used to this kind of...idiocy...
Reply
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